Why Do We Think Physical Punishment is a Good Teaching Tool in Sports?

The other day I got an interesting question via email from a mom of a young travel volleyball player. Her daughter and her team had missed quite a few serves their previous tournament. There were serves into the net. There were serves wide of the court. There were serves over the endline. They were told
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An Open Letter to the Out of Control Sports Parent Sitting Next to Me in the Stands

Dear Out of Control Sports Parent, You. Yeah, you. The one shouting “Get the rebound!!!” to your kid. The one with the heart palpitating so loudly that you cannot contain yourself. The one yelling and complaining about the coach. The one hollering at the 13-year-old referee.  The one angry at my kid for making a
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The Professionalization of Youth Sports

“The Fulham coaches distilled the threat, defined the tactics and dictated the tempo at which they expected their team to play. It was a tough European tournament, featuring Paris Saint-Germain, Monaco, Inter Milan, Bayern Munich, Anderlecht and Feyenoord, but it was deemed to be winnable.” So begins Chapter 2 of the great book No Hunger
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No Excuse for the Abuse: Don’t Tolerate Negative Coaching

“Where did we ever get the crazy idea that to get children to do better, first we have to make them feel worse?” – Jane Nelsen Early in my coaching career, I was speaking with a parent of an athlete about the methods employed by her daughter’s coach. The parent explained how the coach ruled
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Our Children Become the Messages They Hear the Most

Picture the young swimmer stepping up to the starting blocks in a championship race. What is he thinking in that moment? Visualize the soccer player, stepping up to take the deciding penalty kick. What is going through her head? Think of the basketball player, standing on the free throw line needing to make two free
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“When I’m Running, it Feels like I am not Disabled:” Lessons on Being a Great Teammate from the Best Team You’ve Never Heard Of

Dick Hoyt was not a runner in any sense of the word. By his own accounts, he could not remember the last time he had run more than a mile. So when his son Rick told him in the spring of 1977 that he wanted to participate in a 5-mile run to benefit a classmate
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Are you a Blockbuster Coach, or are you a Netflix Coach?

Have you ever heard of Blockbuster Video? Have you seen one lately? There is a reason only one Blockbuster store remains today. Let me explain. In 1992 I was a senior in High School playing for one of the top high school soccer teams in the state. We were successful because our coach was one
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How Do I Balance My WHY with the Demands of the Youth Sports Culture?

“This season was a disaster.” A former colleague of mine said to me recently. “We had a ton of fun, the kids learned a lot of new skills and gelled as a team, but we didn’t win as many games as last season.” “Fun and learning are the two primary things we always wanted out
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Four Words That Can Change the Culture of Youth Sports

If you have ever flown Southwest Airlines, you know that they do things a bit differently. If you ask an employee of the airline what that difference is, they will tell you one word: culture. The culture of Southwest is one they have worked very hard to cultivate, and every pilot, flight attendant, mechanic, and
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Yes, I Do Play My Favorites

(Article written by James Leath (@jamesleath)) “I am sick and tired of coaches playing favorites” a parent once told me at a speaking event. “A coach should be completely impartial. It teaches the wrong message when he or she only plays favorites. Am I right?” I smiled, took a breath and responded, “I actually think
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Dear Potential Recruit, Your Talent Only Gets You So Far

Contributed by James Leath (@jamesleath) “He is going to be shocked we no longer want him.” “Come again?” I asked the college assistant coach seated across from me at lunch. “You flew across the country to meet him, and now you won’t recruit him anymore?” The coach had recently stopped for a day in another
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3 Words Every Athlete Needs to Hear

By James Leath “STOP LOOKING AT YOUR PHONE!” yells Tasha, a point guard on the 6th grade YMCA basketball team I was coaching. Immediately, I smile and start to explain to her that I forgot my watch and I needed to make sure we were on schedule. Tasha rolled her eyes, clearly unimpressed with my
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Redefining Success: 8 Tips for Being a Great Sports Parent

By James Leath “When did parenting get to be so stressful?” began a recent post on the Changing the Game Project Facebook page. “I worry that if I don’t provide them with the best equipment, or get them on the best team, or take them to every camp or tournament, then I am letting my
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The Difference Between Winning and Losing

By James Leath (this first appeared on his blog at www.JamesLeath.com) A former student athlete of mine was awarded a full ride to play NCAA D1 football and he called me recently, just to talk. Calls from former athletes are a huge highlight in any coach’s day. “Coach, what is the difference between winning and
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Three Things All Great Coaches and Leaders Do…And You Can Too! Part I

As a coach who has spent nearly two decades studying and learning about leadership, I know that my thinking has evolved immensely on this subject. For those of you who are looking for a few new ideas, or better yet, you are a  new coach trying to accelerate the learning curve, for the next three
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What Do You Value Most, and Are Youth Sports Delivering For You?

All too often, I see many adults who are involved in youth sports, either as a parent, administrator or a coach, adhere to one set of core values when it comes to family, education, and relationships, and an entirely different set of values when it comes to sports.  We value things like hard work, commitment,
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“Come on, Ref!” Some Thoughts on Officials, Umpires and Referees

As summer tournament season is upon us, many families are traveling far and wide, and spending hard earned dollars on tournaments and other sports travel. Inevitably, there will be a game or a match where a referee makes a poor decision, or gets a call wrong, and this can often lead to yelling, screaming, and
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Don’t Choke: The Difference Between Playing to Win, and Playing Not to Lose

Is your child a great practice player, but one who struggles to perform in games? Does she score at will in easy games, but cannot find the net in the competitive ones? Does your team play great in meaningless games, but tense up and play poorly when the result matters? Does your team always play
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Are You Setting Goals AND Expectations for Your Athlete? Do You Know the Difference?

As a parent, it is incredibly important that we understand the difference between the goals we set with our children, and the expectations we place upon them. The difference is subtle but very important, for both are crucial tools when it comes to raising high performers. We should place expectations upon our children and set
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Utah Referee’s Death is One More Example of the Need to Change the Game!

The recent tragic death of Utah youth soccer referee Ricardo Portillo has once again highlighted the need to make drastic changes in the youth sports environment. Portillo was killed after being punched in the face by a 17 year old player that had been cautioned on the previous play. Once again, the ugly side of
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My Kid Stopped Trying! What Now?

One of the questions I am often asked is “How do I change my kid’s attitude toward sports? He just does not seem into it anymore, and he is not putting any effort in.” This is a situation that can be very confusing and discouraging for both children and parents, as well as cause stress
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Five Messages Your Kids Need to Hear

Youth sports can become an all encompassing component of childhood, and for that matter, parenthood.  As we shuttle kids to practices, games and tournaments, we can easily forget about the big picture. We can lose sight of the main reasons we put kids in sports in the first place.  If we want our children to
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The Problems We Face Part II: Money!

There is an astronomical amount of money being spent on youth sports by parents, as well as huge investments by corporations who profit off of equipment, tournaments, recruiting services, and even live, streaming little league games.  This has created amongst parents a ‘keep up with the Joneses mentality” in everything from Little League to youth
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Sports Skills do Not Always ‘Just Happen!’

Sports Parenting is an art, and for each and every child and family, there are a variety of parenting styles, methods and ideas that can all lead to the outcome of a positive sports experience, and the creation of a life long athlete.   Most of us rely upon our own athletic experiences to guide us with
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Confidence is Earned!

One of the most common questions I got as a coach from parents was “How do I make my kid more confident?”  I wish there was an easy answer, but really, there is not.  You see, one of the great misconceptions about confidence is that it can be bought, or given, and it CANNOT.  Confidence
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